These commercials freak me out

www.thewaytohappiness.org

but what if i want to steal, murder, do something illegal, or cheat on my spouse?

praise allah there is a commercial to tell me not to do those things.

It's just like those truth ads.

They don't make me want to stop smoking.

Instead, they remind me that it's about time to light up another one.

and come on. if my ear is sewed up with lies, I'd rather keep it that way than have my ear

brutally cut open by a dull truth blade.

smoke on, smoker friends, smoke on.

This Man Loves His Balls

and frankly, I just can't get into it

leave the worms, the brains, and the blood.

you know all you want is a hamburger.

stop fooling yourself

Balls aren't as great as you make them seem. 

The True Mavericks

Dumbledore/McGonagall '08

Bringing the Magic back to Democracy.

I have No Reservations

about my love for anthony bourdain. 

Simply because, he knows what's important in life

1) Booze

2) Cigarettes (especially after boozin)

3) Tattoos (especially after boozin)

4) Witty Banter (increasingly witty with booze)

5) A love of travel (as long as you go somewhere with booze)

6) An Appreciation of good food (accompanied with some fine booze)

7) Friends of quality and quantity (sharing booze)

8) Tee-shirts and sunglasses (with a bottle of booze in hand)

9) Having enough balls to do what you want in life. (even if it takes some booze to lower your guard)

10) Having a fucking good time in whatever you do. (because after all that booze, who wouldn't have a damn good time?)

 

Anthony Bourdain: The Way Life Should Be

14 things you know you listened to

Come on, if you are somewhat around my legal age of 21, I know you grew up listening to this music. So let's get a little nostalgic and a little angsty. Julie's Teenage Years Greatest Hits, take one (song, band, emotional memorable lyric).

1) 'Chop Suey' - System of a Down

"I cry when angels deserve to die"

2) 'Stitches' - Orgy

"I mean fucking you is strange and adored by me throughout

Oh no, it's you again"

3) 'Youth of the Nation' - POD

"We are, we are, the youth of the nation"

4) 'Numb' - Linkin Park

"i'm tired of being what you want me to be

feeling so faithless

lost under the surface"

5) 'Cross out the Eyes' - Thursday

"And the morning dove gets caught in the telephone wire"

6) 'Screaming Infidelities' - Dashboard Confessional

"I'll sit alone and wonder

how you're making out

But as for me, I wish that I was anywhere

with anyone

making out"

7) 'I'd do anything' - Simple Plan

"Another day is going by, 

I'm thinking about you all the time

But you're out there

And I'm here waiting"

8) 'The Anthem' - Good Charlotte

"But my high school

felt more to me

like a jail cell

a penitentiary"

9) 'Seventy Times 7' - Brand New

"Cuz I've seen more spine in jellyfish

Seen more guts in 11 year old kids"

10) 'Nookie' - Limp Bizkit

"I did it all for the Nookie"

11) 'You're so Last Summer' - Taking Back Sunday

"Boys like you are a dime a dozen"

12) 'Without Me' - Eminem

"I know that you gotta job Mz Cheney

But your husband's heart problem's complicating!"

13) ' Fat Lip' - Sum 41

"Trashed my own house party 

Because nobody came!"

14) 'All the Small Things' - Blink 182

"Say it ain't so, I will not go"

Life was easier when music was shitty

Let's rock.

Denmark: Not so Copenhappy

Hell's Angels. They aren't a myth. They aren't a bad reality TV series. They are reality. And a pretty big deal in....Denmark.

Of all places of all the gangs in the world Hell's Angels could pick, they chose Denmark to establish their motorcycle mayhem dominance. 

How did this happen? I don't understand. This doesn't make any more sense than Sarah Palin as Vice President. It's strange and wrong on inexplicable levels.

Click here to read (in french) about the sheer rawness of Danemark's Angels.

ALL THE MAVERICKS IN THE HOUSE

PUT YOUR HANDS UP 

if mz maverick had rapped this herself, i would seriously erase the number-#2-pencil-filled-in bubble of my absentee ballot (which currently next to the name of the great barack) and change it to the russian lipstick queen.

Solange Knowles? I'm in.

Yeah, this is old news, but I just discovered this little gem today.

Sure Hayden Panteadsjwhatthefuckeverhernameis speaks in AIM talk, and Solange Knowles ebonically challenged. And sure, the name of the poor, 'ghetto', black high school is Crenshaw Heights High. But after all is said and done... I don't hate it. 

Actually, I liked it enough to not have a cigarette for the 2 hours it took to watch it.

Bring it On, All or Nothing. My anti-drug.

im a believer in joy division & radiohead

For the Emotionally Challenged

Make You Feel My Love covered by Adele

omfg.

our bond is a BAR

we could USE SOMEBODY

Dance like this...

but on top me of me.

Let's go back

To where men are real men.

Where they dress like this:

Where they wrestle like this:

And win like this:

Where they play reggae like this: 

And rap like this:

Where they play soccer like this:

But also like this:

let's go back. nu dem. 

senegal. sama xol. 

LACK OF VOTING DOES NOT LEAD TO DEATH

It seems that voting is the new trend. Celebrities have made poverty cool with the One campaign. Darfur became important for a few minutes. AIDS? I'm inspiRED. Or am i?

The problem with these campaigns is that as soon as the commercials are over, people stop caring. If there are no bracelets to wear or fresh tees to rock, what's the point?

Could campaigns to get the younger generations to vote be just another commercial break between materialism and selfishness?

How do we get people to care?
More importantly, what makes people CONTINUE to care?

Sean P. Diddy Daddy Jean's "Vote or Die" campaign had mixed reviews on its ability to attract younger voters.  (Side note: for all you GW kids out there, this article from 2004 mentions GW!)

Now Mr. Leonardo is trying a different approach. Don't vote! Who cares? Don't do it! Who gives a shit?! 

In my opinion, brilliant. I love it. It really do. It just makes the concept of voting so...simple. I mean alright, I might not change the face of America single handedly. But I do care about something. Anything. Even one thing. Even if I just care about me. 

I think I love this campaign because after you watch the commercial, you can't really make a strong argument against it. They give you the counter argument first. Everything you would say against voting, well they beat you to it. (It's kind of like that scene from 8-mile when Rabbit calls himself out during a freestyle battle for living with his mom before his opponent could hate on him for it). 

Then they take your excuses and just make them seem...silly. 

Vote or Die? I prefer, Vote, Why the Fuck not?

jmj

Planet Epic

Inspired by National Geographic's Planet Earth Marathon, I'd like to reminisce over some visually epic moments.



1. And to see you're really only very small, and whales float on.

2. Fat-bottomed girls.

3. I love you, always forever, near and far, monogamous and arctic. 

4. She got fins to her left, fins to her right, and she's the only seal in town.

5. I am the polar bear. I am the walrus.

6. Sexy can i just pardon my mating rituals?

For the Emotionally Challenged

YEAH!

i do. 

Must Have Fall Accessory

Ladies ladies. You may talk about new shoes, new bags, new hair colors. You may see the new lines from Prada, Yves Saint Laurent, or hell, even Baby Phat if that's more your style. All of these new material goods may inspire you. You think, damn, if only I had that...I would look GOOD this fall. And you know what, maybe you would.

But since I do not have money for Yves Saint Laurent, and I am not desperate enough yet to start shopping on ebay.com ... I have discovered the most essential fall accessory. It is not clothes. It is not make up. It is not hair or shoes or bags. WHAT IS LEFT TO MAKE ME FABULOUS?! you say.

Ladies and Gentlemen... may I present to you... The Gay Friend.

Yes it's true. Nothing will make you look as good or feel as sassy as a fierce little gay on your arm. Let's list some of the benefits, shall we?

1) Inexpensive: Why do we normally buy our men gifts? Probably because they are going to do something or did something that they didn't want to do. Example... you buy lingerie to wear for them because they went shopping with you. You buy them tickets to a sporting event because they watched the Sex and the City movie with you. Gay men do everything you want to do! You don't owe them anything! Shopping, done. Sex and the City, done and done. You name it, it's girly, they love it. Besides, they are probably more fabulous than you. Anything they want to buy, they will most likely just buy it themselves. Phew.

2) Arm candy that keeps you warm: Need a jacket? Grab the closest gay. So warm and cuddly. PDA is not a problem for these spice cakes. They go with any outfit. Portable, accessible, adaptable. And if you see an old boyfriend, those little gays can turn into the straightest, most passionate lover you've ever had. Your ex will see a handsome, put together man who obviously can treat you better than his sorry ass ever could. Aren't accessories supposed to make people jealous anyway?

3) Confidence and Sass: Looking good is only half the battle. Feeling good is equally as important. (In my opinion, its even MORE important). When you change your hair style, try a new perfume, wear a new dress, buy a new shade of eye shadow... you think a STRAIGHT man is going to notice? Hell no. The only reason he would notice your new dress is to figure out the easiest points of access for when duty calls. Gays? They notice everything. And they love love love compliment. So go ahead. Look good, and get sassy! You'll strut and swagger like you didn't even know you could. Because at the end of the day, we all just want to be noticed. Mmmm, get it girl. A good gay always notices. And makes sure everyone else does too.

4) Emotional support: Gays are more than boys, gossip, and shopping. They are loyal, sensitive friends. Sometimes we all just need someone to say "Awww, hunny. are you okay?". Mix that with a cute little pouty face from your most favoritist gay, and your day has to cheer up a bit. Truly good gay friends love to care. And they love to be cared about. So spread the love hunny baby.

Oh there are millions more reason but Tim Gunn is on the tele making it work. So ladies, give your gays a big smooch the next time you see them. An accessory that loves and feels and cries and smiles and kisses and giggles and always looks good? I'm sold.

Peace, love, fall, and fabulous.
sweetz.

TABATHA'S BLOG TAKEOVER

While watching Tabatha's Salon takeover, Julie and I realized that there is only one thing we must do..... Take back the blog....immediately!! I must admit - we have to give credit to that absolutely bitchtastic platinum gremlin that we all know and love from one of the many uncessary reality shows Bravo has to offer, Tabatha.

I find her absolutely terrifying but the brit is actually pretty inspirational. Makes me want to start up my own salon...but instead ill just write on this blog.

So!!! we are bringing it BACK. and in STYLE.

Thank you Tabatha. We dont really know why, but thank you!

LLTS.