Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Picks and Pans: Kanye As of Late

First, the bad news.
PANS: Kanye West "808's and Heartbreak"
What I'm about to say here may be controversial to some, not surprising to others. Ok, deep breath. Kanye West's "808's and Hearbreak" is an appropriate title, because it broke my heart 808 different ways. Let me explain. Last week I spent my ten bucks on iTunes and purchased his new album, weary of it, because to me there was something suspicious about Mr. West releasing an album quite shortly after dropping "Graduation". That coupled with the fact that even he seemed brazenly confident in it - as if he knew people weren't going to like it but 'fuck you guys anyway, because this is my art and i don't give a shit if you approve'. Also, we all know a lot of really heavy shit has happened to him this year, and the album will certainly reflect some of that melancholy, which sets a trap of a mess of a record. Fair enough Mr. West; you can release whatever you want, because as cocky as you are, it's empirically proven that you are the shit. But I'm concerned.

An avid Kanye fan, I listened to "College Dropout", "Late Registration", and "Graduation" in that order, to prepare for "808 and Heartbreak". Remaining a zealous Kanye fan for all three records, it became apparent to me that with each record he made, the quality slipped a little. When "College Dropout" was released, it was on loop in my stereo for months, and I am still blown away by how incredible that record is. I can't even put into words how important that record is to my love of hip hop, and music in general. "Late Registration", less so, but still great. "Graduation", even lesser so, but ok. "808's and Heartbreak"? Kanye. You stomped on my heart.

To be fair, "808's and Heartbreak" has its high points. His joint with Young Jeezy has a good, complex beat that you just can't fuck with. His blend of heavy teiko drums, piano chords and simplistic blue notes are something to be applauded, because those are some tricky combined sounds to pull off. Gotta love Kanye for his ingenuity. But at what point is too much? He was on Conan O'Brien describing how much he loves the electronic sound of the auto tuner, and credited T. Pain for it's prolific use in his music. But Kanye got a little too audio processor happy. It works for T. Pain, because he's only ever featured in other people's songs, really, so it's tolerable. But when your entire album is in auto tuning mode? It's obnoxious. It was like his healing drug and Kanye just couldn't ween himself off of it, and everyone hates an out of control addict.

I think Kanye just got a little too lost in his own thoughts and in his own head with this record, and who can blame him. The man had a lot on his mind, and needed to explore his feelings. Usually despair makes for great art, but Kanye's focus was far too diffuse and all over the place, and the record was a bit of a mess. Here's the silver lining: Kanye is a genius and ever evolving. Most prolific artists produce something that's personally relevant to them at that time, but just kind of barfy in the scope of their career. I'm gonna chalk this record up to that. Kanye will come back to us, I'm confident.

Ok, now for the PICKS:

Kanye West's aesthetic as of late. Everything else but the music with Kanye's latest project is outstanding. With a name like "808's and Heartbreak", you expect the album to be incredible. So point one for the album name. The cover art on his album is also so simple yet elegant, different yet eye-pleasing. I love the Murakami art on "Graduation", but the album cover for "808" is one that I connected with, and really enjoyed taking a look at. I'm partial to the minimalistic and abstract, sure, but the use of select colors and shapes were really evocative in a not so in your face way.

And let's just give it up for Kanye's fashion for a second. The Louis Vuitton Don made Vanity Fair's International Best Dressed List (on the same page as my 9th grade history teacher's daughter, Stacy. how do you like them apples?) this summer. It's about damn time he got mainstream recognition with the more urbane set for his flair and fresh urban elegance. Young men try to dress like him, and for good reason. This guy knows how to pair his vintage, with his wayfarers and tweed blazer, for the professor-chic look. On Conan, he wore that heart button he's been sporting recently, but I never realized that it was ACTUALLY made out of Legos. That is the shit. Kanye is always looking crispy as hell, and I have to say - I have never seen him look shabby. EVER.

OOOKKKK so if you read this entire thing, thanks for bearing with me. Let me be clear that I still think Kanye single handedly resuscitated hip hop, and as long as he's around, hip hop is not dead.

Yours Truly,

Friday, November 7, 2008

Judge Me

I can't help to but think this is a baller combo. If i wasn't too old school and only strictly played video games produced in the 80s maybe early 90s - id probably challenge a little Batman vs Raiden action.

Quilty Pleasure

If I Were a Boy by Beyonce Knowles
(click on pic to watch music vid)

Ok so the lyrics are kind of wack....but it is a quite emotional ballad that i just cant seem to resist. Maybe it is because I have been going through a Some Like it Hot phase or maybe since I work at a tanning salon and hear this song...oh 13 times a day - either way it's phenom

beyonce - love it girlll

Sunday, November 2, 2008

Dream Trip of the Week

No, just no.

Dear Fall Out Boy,

Stop trying. Because I care. About you, your poor disillusioned fans, and the off chance that I might accidently hear your music on the radio. Your music sucks. And no one should be subjected to it. Not even you. The mime in your video is more talented than you, Fall Out Boy. Thank you. If you stop playing music, I'll stop smoking cigarettes. Pinky swear.

Love, Julie

P.S. I do love the faux-Palin appearance at the end of your video.

It's tough to be a maverick

sorry palin, apparently your tina fey looks aren't enough to impress the majority of Americans. Thanks to CNN for the article
Fifty-seven percent of likely voters say Sarah Palin does not have the personal qualities a president should have.

Monday, October 27, 2008

These commercials freak me out

but what if i want to steal, murder, do something illegal, or cheat on my spouse?

praise allah there is a commercial to tell me not to do those things.

It's just like those truth ads.
They don't make me want to stop smoking.
Instead, they remind me that it's about time to light up another one.

and come on. if my ear is sewed up with lies, I'd rather keep it that way than have my ear
brutally cut open by a dull truth blade.

smoke on, smoker friends, smoke on.

This Man Loves His Balls

and frankly, I just can't get into it

leave the worms, the brains, and the blood.

you know all you want is a hamburger.
stop fooling yourself

Balls aren't as great as you make them seem. 

The True Mavericks

Dumbledore/McGonagall '08
Bringing the Magic back to Democracy.

I have No Reservations

about my love for anthony bourdain. 

Simply because, he knows what's important in life
1) Booze
2) Cigarettes (especially after boozin)
3) Tattoos (especially after boozin)
4) Witty Banter (increasingly witty with booze)
5) A love of travel (as long as you go somewhere with booze)
6) An Appreciation of good food (accompanied with some fine booze)
7) Friends of quality and quantity (sharing booze)
8) Tee-shirts and sunglasses (with a bottle of booze in hand)
9) Having enough balls to do what you want in life. (even if it takes some booze to lower your guard)
10) Having a fucking good time in whatever you do. (because after all that booze, who wouldn't have a damn good time?)


Anthony Bourdain: The Way Life Should Be

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

14 things you know you listened to

Come on, if you are somewhat around my legal age of 21, I know you grew up listening to this music. So let's get a little nostalgic and a little angsty. Julie's Teenage Years Greatest Hits, take one (song, band, emotional memorable lyric).

1) 'Chop Suey' - System of a Down
"I cry when angels deserve to die"
2) 'Stitches' - Orgy
"I mean fucking you is strange and adored by me throughout
Oh no, it's you again"
3) 'Youth of the Nation' - POD
"We are, we are, the youth of the nation"
4) 'Numb' - Linkin Park
"i'm tired of being what you want me to be
feeling so faithless
lost under the surface"
5) 'Cross out the Eyes' - Thursday
"And the morning dove gets caught in the telephone wire"
6) 'Screaming Infidelities' - Dashboard Confessional
"I'll sit alone and wonder
how you're making out
But as for me, I wish that I was anywhere
with anyone
making out"
7) 'I'd do anything' - Simple Plan
"Another day is going by, 
I'm thinking about you all the time
But you're out there
And I'm here waiting"
8) 'The Anthem' - Good Charlotte
"But my high school
felt more to me
like a jail cell
a penitentiary"
9) 'Seventy Times 7' - Brand New
"Cuz I've seen more spine in jellyfish
Seen more guts in 11 year old kids"
10) 'Nookie' - Limp Bizkit
"I did it all for the Nookie"
11) 'You're so Last Summer' - Taking Back Sunday
"Boys like you are a dime a dozen"
12) 'Without Me' - Eminem
"I know that you gotta job Mz Cheney
But your husband's heart problem's complicating!"
13) ' Fat Lip' - Sum 41
"Trashed my own house party 
Because nobody came!"
14) 'All the Small Things' - Blink 182
"Say it ain't so, I will not go"

Life was easier when music was shitty

Let's rock.

Denmark: Not so Copenhappy

Hell's Angels. They aren't a myth. They aren't a bad reality TV series. They are reality. And a pretty big deal in....Denmark.

Of all places of all the gangs in the world Hell's Angels could pick, they chose Denmark to establish their motorcycle mayhem dominance. 

How did this happen? I don't understand. This doesn't make any more sense than Sarah Palin as Vice President. It's strange and wrong on inexplicable levels.

Click here to read (in french) about the sheer rawness of Danemark's Angels.

Monday, October 20, 2008



if mz maverick had rapped this herself, i would seriously erase the number-#2-pencil-filled-in bubble of my absentee ballot (which currently next to the name of the great barack) and change it to the russian lipstick queen.

Sunday, October 19, 2008

Solange Knowles? I'm in.

Yeah, this is old news, but I just discovered this little gem today.

Sure Hayden Panteadsjwhatthefuckeverhernameis speaks in AIM talk, and Solange Knowles ebonically challenged. And sure, the name of the poor, 'ghetto', black high school is Crenshaw Heights High. But after all is said and done... I don't hate it. 

Actually, I liked it enough to not have a cigarette for the 2 hours it took to watch it.

Bring it On, All or Nothing. My anti-drug.

im a believer in joy division & radiohead

For the Emotionally Challenged

Make You Feel My Love covered by Adele

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Dance like this...

but on top me of me.

Let's go back

To where men are real men.

Where they dress like this:
Where they wrestle like this:
And win like this:
victoire by hippolyte photography.

Where they play reggae like this: 

And rap like this:
Where they play soccer like this:
Soccer in Senegal by Brendan Baker.
But also like this:

let's go back. nu dem. 
senegal. sama xol. 

Sunday, October 12, 2008


It seems that voting is the new trend. Celebrities have made poverty cool with the One campaign. Darfur became important for a few minutes. AIDS? I'm inspiRED. Or am i?

The problem with these campaigns is that as soon as the commercials are over, people stop caring. If there are no bracelets to wear or fresh tees to rock, what's the point?

Could campaigns to get the younger generations to vote be just another commercial break between materialism and selfishness?

How do we get people to care?
More importantly, what makes people CONTINUE to care?

Sean P. Diddy Daddy Jean's "Vote or Die" campaign had mixed reviews on its ability to attract younger voters.  (Side note: for all you GW kids out there, this article from 2004 mentions GW!)

Now Mr. Leonardo is trying a different approach. Don't vote! Who cares? Don't do it! Who gives a shit?! 

In my opinion, brilliant. I love it. It really do. It just makes the concept of voting so...simple. I mean alright, I might not change the face of America single handedly. But I do care about something. Anything. Even one thing. Even if I just care about me. 

I think I love this campaign because after you watch the commercial, you can't really make a strong argument against it. They give you the counter argument first. Everything you would say against voting, well they beat you to it. (It's kind of like that scene from 8-mile when Rabbit calls himself out during a freestyle battle for living with his mom before his opponent could hate on him for it). 

Then they take your excuses and just make them seem...silly. 

Vote or Die? I prefer, Vote, Why the Fuck not?


Planet Epic

Inspired by National Geographic's Planet Earth Marathon, I'd like to reminisce over some visually epic moments.

1. And to see you're really only very small, and whales float on.

2. Fat-bottomed girls.

3. I love you, always forever, near and far, monogamous and arctic. 

4. She got fins to her left, fins to her right, and she's the only seal in town.

5. I am the polar bear. I am the walrus.

6. Sexy can i just pardon my mating rituals?

Thursday, October 9, 2008

Must Have Fall Accessory

Ladies ladies. You may talk about new shoes, new bags, new hair colors. You may see the new lines from Prada, Yves Saint Laurent, or hell, even Baby Phat if that's more your style. All of these new material goods may inspire you. You think, damn, if only I had that...I would look GOOD this fall. And you know what, maybe you would.

But since I do not have money for Yves Saint Laurent, and I am not desperate enough yet to start shopping on ... I have discovered the most essential fall accessory. It is not clothes. It is not make up. It is not hair or shoes or bags. WHAT IS LEFT TO MAKE ME FABULOUS?! you say.

Ladies and Gentlemen... may I present to you... The Gay Friend.

Yes it's true. Nothing will make you look as good or feel as sassy as a fierce little gay on your arm. Let's list some of the benefits, shall we?

1) Inexpensive: Why do we normally buy our men gifts? Probably because they are going to do something or did something that they didn't want to do. Example... you buy lingerie to wear for them because they went shopping with you. You buy them tickets to a sporting event because they watched the Sex and the City movie with you. Gay men do everything you want to do! You don't owe them anything! Shopping, done. Sex and the City, done and done. You name it, it's girly, they love it. Besides, they are probably more fabulous than you. Anything they want to buy, they will most likely just buy it themselves. Phew.

2) Arm candy that keeps you warm: Need a jacket? Grab the closest gay. So warm and cuddly. PDA is not a problem for these spice cakes. They go with any outfit. Portable, accessible, adaptable. And if you see an old boyfriend, those little gays can turn into the straightest, most passionate lover you've ever had. Your ex will see a handsome, put together man who obviously can treat you better than his sorry ass ever could. Aren't accessories supposed to make people jealous anyway?

3) Confidence and Sass: Looking good is only half the battle. Feeling good is equally as important. (In my opinion, its even MORE important). When you change your hair style, try a new perfume, wear a new dress, buy a new shade of eye shadow... you think a STRAIGHT man is going to notice? Hell no. The only reason he would notice your new dress is to figure out the easiest points of access for when duty calls. Gays? They notice everything. And they love love love compliment. So go ahead. Look good, and get sassy! You'll strut and swagger like you didn't even know you could. Because at the end of the day, we all just want to be noticed. Mmmm, get it girl. A good gay always notices. And makes sure everyone else does too.

4) Emotional support: Gays are more than boys, gossip, and shopping. They are loyal, sensitive friends. Sometimes we all just need someone to say "Awww, hunny. are you okay?". Mix that with a cute little pouty face from your most favoritist gay, and your day has to cheer up a bit. Truly good gay friends love to care. And they love to be cared about. So spread the love hunny baby.

Oh there are millions more reason but Tim Gunn is on the tele making it work. So ladies, give your gays a big smooch the next time you see them. An accessory that loves and feels and cries and smiles and kisses and giggles and always looks good? I'm sold.

Peace, love, fall, and fabulous.


While watching Tabatha's Salon takeover, Julie and I realized that there is only one thing we must do..... Take back the blog....immediately!! I must admit - we have to give credit to that absolutely bitchtastic platinum gremlin that we all know and love from one of the many uncessary reality shows Bravo has to offer, Tabatha.
I find her absolutely terrifying but the brit is actually pretty inspirational. Makes me want to start up my own salon...but instead ill just write on this blog.
So!!! we are bringing it BACK. and in STYLE.
Thank you Tabatha. We dont really know why, but thank you!

Monday, July 7, 2008


there is a huge international problem facing us. i thought we had rid ourselves of this evil in the early 90s. but this travesty still plagues us.

WHY cannot we move on from the days of WHITE SKECHERS.

they are always a fashion no.

this crisis was brought to my attention during my recent visit to the ocean city boardwalk in maryland.
white tank tops, stone washed jeans, slicked back pony tails, fake gaudy sunglasses, and white skechers.


please. if you come in contact with this villain, BURN THEM.
now. don't wait.

thank you for doing your part to save the world.

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

This picture is mind-blowing for several reasons:
1) It's star-packed, with the best stars you can pack into one picture. There's Bowie, Iman and Lesley Gore.

2) Fucking Lesley Gore and Bowie are shaking hands. Can you imagine the type of electricity and greatness that handshake posesses?

3) Ok, that's pretty much it. Just Lesley Gore and David Bowie shaking hands. And if you don't know who Lesley Gore is aside from a reference from John Water's "Hairspray", shame on you. Part of the "Girl Group" movement, she sang, "It's My Party", "You Don't Own Me" and co-wrote "Out Here On My Own" - that's right - that song from "Fame" sang by Irene Cara. That incredible, squeaky clean Doris Day-ish woman also came out in 2005, at the age of 63. Incredible.

Saturday, June 28, 2008


Throw back Tegan and Sara song: My Number 
I love this song with alllll myy <3>

My Number - Tegan And Sara

hey now

Chris Brown and Ciara KILLING IT at the BET awards

Usually I would have mah gurl Rihanna's back (luv you girl hey now) 
but Ciara kills it to the point where i actually took my eyes off of CB. 
check it out bbbbbbb

Thursday, June 26, 2008

give meee

lisa perry you rock. i heart you and all of your fabulousness
now give me all your CLOTHESS preetttyyyy please

check out her fall collection :

It is toooooooo cute!!!!!


cutttiee things that put a smile on mah face

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Gotta have em gotta have em gotta have em

Damn, even Imelda Marcos would be jealous if you got your hands on a pair of these...especially since there are only 178 of them world wide:

click the pic to check out busy p and some hot sneaks

Tuesday, June 24, 2008


Our Dirty Little Secret

YES, we remember every word. 
YES, we lost a little respect for ourselves 
YES, we are OK with it


After that Haley Joel rant...I couldn't help it with this next post. 

Thank you Chuck Norris
Thank you CBS
Thank you Conan O'Brien

He is a little visitor now...

If you liked that Haley Joel Osment jawn

A&E added a new reality tv show to their new monday night line up.  While I was upset that Paranormal State (yes, the show about Penn State kids ghost hunting LUVS it.. judge meee) was not going to be following Intervention I was relieved that another paranormal reality show jacked that time slot 



exploiting kids with some serious emotional and psychological issues?
NO WAY....... it is TV at its finest. 

Who wouldn't believe REAL kids
 seeing their own versions of Mischa Barton?

 ew wtfz. 
Yes, I have it TIVOED.
I so badly want to believe.....

Haley is lookin good these days. You know, In a haley joel kind of way...

You will be missed. :(

George Carlin...we love you.

Finally a song I can relate to

Heidi Montag has a new song out and I must say I am completely satisfied. It is everything I expected and more.

Read the lyrics for yourself kidz. Who doesn't love FASHION?

I mean....
"I’m too fabu-lous
I’m so fierce that it’s so nuts
I live to be model thin
Dress me, I’m your manne-quin"

like omg, did she read my diary?

I need, some new stile-ttos
Can’t walk, down the street in those
You are, who you wear it’s true
A girl’s just as hot as the store she chooses

such an amazing role model to all those pre teens that watch the hills religiously. seriously gurllll, i couldn't have said it better myself.

and lets talk about the repeating gets me everytime

Fashion put it all on me
Don’t you want to see these clothes on me
Fashion put it all on me
I am anyone you want me to be
Fashion put it all on me
Don’t you want to see these clothes on me
Fashion put it all on me
I am anyone you want me to be

No, put those clothes on ME.... i wish I were you Heidi, youre so so lucky!!
omg I am sure Spencer is so so proud. 

lol xoxo tooo cutttieeeeeeee

This post it dedicated to Spencer Pratt everyone. 
For making Heidi who she is today. 

Thank you Heidi and Spencer for your unhealthy and completely destructive relationship for amusing me on a daily basis.  First a reality show and then a music career.  When are these two going to hit the silver screen? 

Monday, June 23, 2008

my favorite band

Nammnaala Timshel Band, sama xarit Abdoulaye ak sama xol Francois. jerejefwaaye. ba ci kanam inshallah.

da booty

Ladies, it is OKAY to have curves. More importantly, it is OKAY to have a little junk in the trunk. An ass can be an accessory so flaunt it, love it, BE PROUD OF IT. So my advice to all you bonita applebums out there... shake that ass girl because you world renowned.

I mean...Even R Kelly is feelin' on yo booty.
So hit up this jam and love your lady lumps.


Bust seriously girls, all jokes aside, love your body. Appreciate your curves. Learn to love feeling like a woman, a real woman with the curves you were born to rock. Be proud of who you are and be proud of your body. Because confidence is infinitely sexier than any body image.  

Like my girl, the queen bee....
Queen Latifa
now this is a woman!

MTV debuted Shawty Lo's "Foolish Remix"

I may wind up eating my words on this one because sometimes songs need to grow on me, and I'd be dissing a serious candidate for The 2008 Summer Joint, but something's missing.

High octane beat? Check. Heavy cadence characteristic of southern hip hop that make you nod your head like a narcoleptic? Check. Party time spirit? Uh huh. Collabo with DJ Khaled? Yep. CAMEOS BY WEEZY F. BABY, Rick Ross and Jim Jones?! YEAH IT'S FUCKING THERE. So what's wrong? All the elements and important name dropping are there, yet something is amiss.

The whole argument of hip hop being dead is approaching the "fact" line, but what can recucitate hip hop's waning cred is putting the emphasis back on a tight flow. I'm on Shawty Lo's adversary, T.I.'s side. I really believe T.I.P when he proclaims himself the King of the South, because he has all these elements (except not as much name dropping, because fuck you T.I. doesn't need anyone) AND lyrics/flow that really make you say "wow, can't fuck with this guy. he really is the southern hip hopasaurus rex." Whatever happened to rapping TO the beat? And if it's a banging beat, you really can't go wrong. Don't get lost in the flash and the bling. Imagine if Shawty Lo had a really tight flow? This song would be absolutely MIND BLOWING.

I really want to like this song, I do. But lack of flow is keeping me from fully committing to lending my approval. All I'm saying is a little less flossy flossy, and a little more flow. Is that too much to ask for?

Sunday, June 22, 2008

10 reasons black men are better

1. rippling bodies coated in a chocolatey exterior
2. moves that make you want that lovey dovey, that kiss kiss. because in your mind your fantasizing about getting with him.

3. fierce style with fierce attitude. 
4. an understanding of the importance of accessorizing 

5. sexily cocky confidence and a swagger that makes you wanna lick the rapper... err wrapper 

6. inseparable combination pride and passion
7. natural rhythm

8. confident determination

9. soul and spirit

10. and oh my fucking god... just mmmm mmmmmm.

thank you to contributions from reggie bush, chris brown, common, pharrell, lil' wayne, el hadj diouf, bob marley, barack obama, jimi hendrix, and tyson beckford.